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Let's do it as a top ten: My number 1 is

 

"Did j'all make this"?

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ohdeargawd i MUST have a hat like that!!!!  LOLOLOL!!!

We can order hats like that from Vista Print or a tshirt

 

I have a good one: My husband told me once he was going to buy me a black shirt that said: BUY IT OR BEAT IT. LOL!!!
in this economy I would say yes, with a 50% deposit :)

To preface my story, I will start by telling you that I use all natural dried flowers and foliage in my art.

 With that said, I was at a show in January when a young guy of maybe 19 or 20 came into my booth.  "What's this thing?" he asked as he pointed to a cluster of whole dried poppy pods.  I replied, "It's a poppy pod".  He turned and looked at me and said, "Dude."  (Ummm. Do I look Like a dude?!?!)   "Dude, can you smoke it???"  Taken aback and highly annoyed I reply, "I don't know".  He says, "Dude" (Again!?)  "Lemme buy it off of you.  Seriously...I'll pay you for it."

I looked at him, obviously ticked off and I said, "Dude, get the H@*% out of my tent." 

 

A Chicago gardener aquaintance had to stop growing poppies in his front yard. Said there were too many teenagers hanging around, and the neighbors were starting to look at him funny. Seriously.

ROTF!!

"we're not putting that crap on our wall"

 

I guess I should explain.  My art is fish. Here's how it usually goes.  A man will step into the booth and as he's looking at all the fish he sees the one that he has to have.  He looks over to his wife, points to the fish he wants, and before he can say anything she will utter those sale stopping words. 

 

I have learned to take "did you make all this yourself as a compliment.  I still haven't figured out the best way to reply to "how long did it take to make this?". But the one I really hate is "Your prices are too low".   I never hear this one from folks who are actually buying the art. 

 

All that being said, I can't wait to get out there again next weekend and hear these all over again. 

Yes, "where are you going to hang that" has lost me more than one sale!  Of course the one comment that every photographer gets at least once every show is "you must have a really good camera". 
An older woman (well, at the time I was younger) was in my booth looking at the work, and had her daughter, son-in-law, and their kids in tow. She was looking at a very conservative nude where the model was sitting on a stool with arms wrapped around her legs and head down on the knees. She asked the price, I told her, and stayed out the way. The daughter starts badgering her mother, "Surely you don't like that". Mom says she does and keeps looking around. 'Mom, you don't have room for it", 'I would make room for it", "Mom, where on earth would you hang that?", so mom bless her heart says, "I'll put it above the fireplace in the living room", comes back and hands me the plastic. End of argument :-)
I agree with you, Dave. And that comment is exactly like telling a chef, "You must have a really good set of cookware."
I get the camera comment all the time. I usually just reply with "Yeah... there is a little more to it than that."

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